This video from Atom typifies the stereotypes of white people that seem to be politically correct these days. I hate to say it but it’s funny. So spread yourself some miracle whip on your wonder bread sandwich, grab a chair and check it out.
In a stunning reversal of fortune for a small Alabama town, the American Government is switching to Chinese made condoms to save money on the international AIDS (and pregnancy) prevention program directed at poor countries.
At a time when the federal government is spending billions of stimulus dollars to stem the tide of U.S. layoffs, should that same government put even more Americans out of work by buying cheaper foreign products?
In this case, Chinese condoms.
That’s the dilemma for the folks at jobs, the government is switching to cheaper off-shore condoms, including some made in China.
In a move expected to cost 300 American the U.S. Agency for International Development, which has distributed an estimated 10 billion U.S.-made AIDS-preventing condoms in poor countries around the world.
But not anymore.
The switch comes despite assurances over the years that the agency would continue to buy American whenever possible. source McClatchy
Based on the reputation for the quality of Chinese goods, one has to wonder if the pregnancy rate and AIDs transmission rate will increase amongst recipients due to condom failures.
Viagra sales could suffer if there is high lead content in the Chinese condoms, causing an unexpected “stiffening”.
With the US economy suffering from ED, economic dysfunction, perhaps money from the Stimulus Bill could be used to buy American and keep the American factory up (and running), keeping our friends around the world waving the American flag.
Received in an email, source unknown:
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950’s, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right, so let’s just end it on friendly terms. We can smile, slate it up to irreconcilable differences, and go our own ways.
Here is a model dissolution agreement:
Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes. We don’t like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.
Since you hate guns and war, we’ll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O’Donnell (you are however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move them).
We’ll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies, and illegal aliens. We’ll keep the hot Alaskan Hockey Moms, greedy CEO’s, and Rednecks. We’ll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood .
You can make nice with Iran , Palestine , and France , and we’ll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protestors. When our allies or way of life are under assault, we’ll provide them job security.
We’ll keep our Judeo-Christian Values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, and Shirley McClain. You can have the U.N. But we will no longer be paying the bill. We’ll keep the SUV’s, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru Station Wagon you can find.
You can give everyone healthcare, if you can find any practicing Doctors (that is practicing, Howard Dean) who will follow to your turf (sic). We’ll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right.
We’ll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and The National Anthem. I’m sure you’ll be happy to substitute Imagine, I’d Like to Teach The World To Sing, Kum Ba Ya, or We Are the World.
We’ll practice trickle down economics, and you can give trickle up poverty its best shot.
Since it often so offends you we’ll keep our History, our Name, and our Flag.
Would you agree to this?
In the spirit of friendly parting, I’ll bet you ANWAR on who will need whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student
AmericanP.S. Please take Barbra Streisand.
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the land
We tried to find to solace, in the troubles at hand.
The markets in meltdown, our 401’s toast
The Fed cuts the rates, but the banks are all closed.
The politicians all squabble, with the dems in command
The GOP had been routed, like Custer’s last stand
When out in DC, there arose such a clatter?
I turned to CNN to see what was the matter.
Team Obama and Michelle were planning their ball
With buffed pecks and cute kids, he’d come to save us all
Now Nancy, now Harry
Now Levin and Waxman
On Murtha, on Rangle
On Dodd and on Clinton!
Raise all the taxes, and raise the capital gains
Tax it if it moves by truck or by trains
Spend all you want, spend a billion here and two there
We pay it back later, nobody will care
Shouldn’t we save Mr. Presidnet? Shouldn’t we try to be thrifty?
Who though hope and change meant top tax rates at fifty?
But I heard exclaim as he became leader of our land
Don’t worry bout a thing folks, hope and change are at hand.
(Sorry, I couldn’t resist, and I am bored stiff waiting for tonight’s Christmas services.)
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